Clairesant’s Weblog

March 22, 2008

Lady Talk: How to know if his love is real

Filed under: relationships — Tags: , , , , — clairesant @ 8:14 am

Most people think love exists because of physical expressions that are present in the relationship. We usually base it on feelings.  Can we really guess if two people are really in love or if their love is real? Can we safely say that when we see a man and a woman holding hands together, hugging or kissing, they really love each other? It is one thing to know if you are in love. It is another thing to know if your partner really loves you.  Maybe we should define what love is. There are many types of love. Many books have been written about this subject. But the best definition can be found in the Bible. It clearly defines love in 1 Corinthians 13. I’ve just clearly understood the application of 1 Corinthians 13 in a man-woman relationship. When your man’s love points you towards God then that is real love. What do I mean by this? Ladies, I’m sure some of you have experienced or are experiencing this. Whenever your man demonstrates his love, care or thoughtfulness, how do you feel? You feel great, right? But have you ever felt that your man’s acts and goodness remind you of God’s love? I did and I still do. I’m not an emotional type of woman but I can’t help but cry whenever he demonstrates his care and love for me. Whenever I’m down or sick, he’s there to comfort, encourage and take care of me. Those simple gestures, his forgiveness, patience, gentleness – I believe is God’s way of telling me that He loves me so much and He cares for me. That is why He brought this man into my life to love, cherish and take care of me.  In the end, God is glorified. Is God glorified in your current relationship? I’m convinced that it is indeed easy to have a boyfriend and have as many boyfriends as you want. But it is hard to find someone who loves and not lusts over you, who is not just after your face or your body but someone who wants to live and grow old with you. Someone who is willing to wait to enjoy you until marriage. Wait for that man in your life. Because he is worth the wait and you are worth loving.

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March 20, 2008

My Opinion: To Pursue or not Pursue? « Clairesant’s Weblog

Filed under: Uncategorized — clairesant @ 7:02 am

My Opinion: To Pursue or not Pursue? « Clairesant’s Weblog

My Opinion: To Pursue or not Pursue?

Filed under: relationships — Tags: , , , — clairesant @ 7:00 am

Before you continue reading, just want to give you a heads up that this question is meant to be for ladies. Yes, men are not supposed to dwell too much on this question. If you think you like that single woman out there who has no major issues then go ahead. Get to know her well and court her if you think you really like her.  So what about for women? I agree with what they say that when a woman initiates a relationship with a man, she’ll do the initiating for the rest of her married life with him. Men are designed to be initiators, pursuers or “chasers” whatever you may call it. Women are to be pursued. This is not a cultural issue. God created Adam before Eve. Adam saw her and he liked her.  Since I was a child, I’ve always thought that it was not normal for a woman to pursue. Nobody told me that. It’s instinct. I just thought that was the norm. Ladies, it’s nice and it feels good to be pursued. I always believed that a man should love a woman more than she should love him…not until marriage where degree or level of love should be equal. This is not a campaign on woman’s power or something. Many times, we think (and even a lot of men do) that men like girls who are head over heels in love with them. It makes them feel good about themselves. It feeds their ego. This setup about women being the initiators maybe successful but not always especially in the long run.  I’ve asked a lot of good men about this including my brothers (Yes! I did my homework a long time ago.) And take note, good men. Their answer is yes, they love it of course especially if she’s a hot babe…a good girlfriend material but not a wife material. They all agreed that they still want to be the pursuers; they want a sense of challenge. It makes them more fulfilled and successful when they went through a tough job. Some men don’t like to work hard though. They just wait for good girls to come. Well, they won’t because real good girls never chase after boys. You may think it’s not true that all good men are taken. It could be true. And some are just waiting. But if they don’t want to work hard, forget them. And if you girls can’t wait, good luck. You will miss the fun of being pursued. I still believe that real good men don’t want to be pursued. Because good men are the hardworking ones and they’ll work hard to pursue you.  What about those men who got no courage to propose? Well, bad news is there are men like that. They don’t want rejection or they are just full of fears. But how can you expect those men to be responsible leaders of their future families and decision makers who are able to handle conflicts if they can’t even do a simple task that their hearts are crying out for. How can you entrust your life to that kind of man who is so afraid to face challenge, risks and possible failure?  Back to the Ladies…So for those who can’t wait, get your acts together! Sorry but all you can do is wait, pray, be confident and stay beautiful. Always remember that after all, good men love not-easy-to-get, beautiful (in and out), confident, independent, godly and patient women. J

March 14, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — clairesant @ 12:52 am

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